The full title is Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf. In some territories, it was Stirba—Werewolf Bitch, referring to the villain of the picture, played by Sybil Danning. I can sum up what kind of movie Howling II is by describing the end credits: a second-rate 80s song plays while the editors slap together a kinetic highlight reel, repeatedly including a shot of Stirba baring her breasts to the beat of the music. I am simply not objective enough to review a movie as shamelessly goofy as this. I literally could not dislike it.
My brain is telling me Joe Dante’s original picture is the better film with its ensemble cast of seasoned actors. My heart, however, is infatuated with this undeniably dumb blood-and-tits feature, which coasts on the singular presence of Christopher Lee as an occult private investigator. Any movie which concocts to portray Lee and Sybil Danning as siblings is immediately endearing, so it’s with a heavy heart I must report that Lee considered the film an embarrassment; he later confessed he only took the role because he had yet to do a proper werewolf picture despite appearing in a dozen vampire flicks.
Spoilers for The Howling follow….
At the end of The Howling, we saw Karen White transform into a werewolf and sacrifice her life on live TV to warn the world that lycanthropy is real. In this film, nobody seems to remember that this was clearly broadcast on live TV. Her brother, Ben (Reb Brown), is shown mourning what he believes was a senseless murder. At the funeral, werewolf-hunter Stefan Crosscoe (Lee) approaches Ben and informs him his sister is not really dead as the silver bullets were removed during the autopsy. Ben is understandably skeptical, but one of Karen’s news buddies (Annie McEnroe), convinces him to hear the hunter out. It’s not long before the three of them head to Transylvania to find the werewolves’ leader: Sirba, the werewolf bitch herself.
This isn’t your grandpa’s werewolf flick. When they aren’t feeding on innocent victims, the hyper-sexualized werewolves spend most of their free time throwing orgies (in and out of their hairy wolf forms) and preparing virgin sacrifices to maintain Stirba’s youthful appearance. Whenever Stirba is dressed, which is rarely, it’s in a costume that’s equally goofy and gorgeous, like something out of Flash Gordon. Danning is amazing in this movie, even going so far as to hold her own with Christopher Lee in the hilarious showdown at the end. It’s not that she’s rises to the occasion so much as Lee lowers himself to it.
Okay, it may not be better than the original picture, but it is a little more entertaining in some places. And if hairy tits are your thing, you’re gonna love this movie.
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